Closure...it's such a weird thing!

Well, tonight has been a weird night. I was showing one of my friends at BTSR the video I made for the students at Holland Road before I left. While I was watching it, there were parts that made me emotional as the memories flooded my mind, but at the same time, there was not a longing to go back to that time and be with "my" students. It's not that I don't miss them because I do. It's more of a knowing that I am where I need to be. While I was at Holland Road, I learned a lot and was able to serve and be served by a plethora of great people. For that, I am forever thankful, but everything has a time and it s my time to be at seminary.

Through this experience, I have learned that there are many stages to closure. For me, I went through a period of no contact whatsoever which was an adjustment period for me and the students and volunteers. Then there was a stage that was strange and uncomfortable at times where everyone was trying to define what the new normal looked like and setting new boundaries. This was followed by a stage of trying to live up to the new standards and staying within the new boundary system. Throughout these stages, for me, there was a longing to be back doing what I had always done. Now, I have reached a new stage in which I can watch and talk about the student ministry and that time in my ministry without a strong longing to be back in that place. For me this is coming to an understanding that God is still at work in my life and the student ministry at HRBC, but us doing a new thing in each of us that is different but great. There may be many more stages that follow this, but ths is the breakthrough that I have come to tonight.

As I think over this situation, I can't help but wonder what else am I holding onto that I need to let go of? What is it that I am not letting go of and thus hindering the work of the Lord both in that area and in me? Where do I need to let go and let God? I challenge each of you to enter this discussion and ask yourself these questions as well.